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the clothier of the revolution
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 10th, 2009|11:30 pm] |
thought i was the main character
turns out i'm just supporting cast
i enter the scene
say something obscene
while others just walk past
i thought i had top billing
took umbrage with the studio
i'm just a walk-on part
a broken heart
i come and then i go
i won't be up for an award
this is not my big break
i'm a minor factor
a character actor
with my best things already in my wake
i am not stepping down
i am just returning home
with my tail dangling 'tween my legs
i have not failed
i just didn't achieve my hopes
this existence it is not the dregs
thought that this would be my oscar moment
performance for your consideration
the shot heard round the world
the tears that crumbled a nation
but it was just a minor scene
before redford smiled and tipped his hat
so if you need me check the crowd
with the extras is where i'm at
i thought that i
was the main character
turns out that i'm supporting cast
but that's okay because the spotlight fades
while these little roles they always last |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 5th, 2009|09:28 pm] |
you look at me
through the bathroom steam
we share a moment
but it's just a gleam
we never speak her name
anymore
hard to remember
hard to care
hard to really put
myself there
when the only reminders we have
are pictures of the ocean
you look at me
from across the table
almost expectantly
but i'm just not able
to speak her name
anymore
hard to remember
hard to care
hard to really put
myself there
hard to want
to live it again
when the first time
only brought pain
you look at me
from the other side of the glass
another moment missing
another day has passed
won't speak her name
anymore
hard to remember
hard to care
hard to really put
myself there
when the only reminders we have
are pictures of the ocean |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 30th, 2009|02:21 pm] |
do you remember all the better days
every night was saturday
do you remember do you recall
what i was saying after all
this is not my
dream
this just makes me
wanna scream
do you remember attitude
changing names having gratitude
beer in our belly smoke in our lungs
youth is wasted on the young
this is not my
dream
this just makes me
wanna scream
maybe i will
after the kids have gone to sleep
pour my frustration
slowly seep
spiral down
circling the rim
i maybe oughta really
learned to swim
do you remember leading the crowd
all the music was so loud
we would dance saying fuck-all to this life
the world was our oyster we were the knife
this is not my
d-d-d-d-dream
this all just makes me
wanna
SCREAM
this is not my not my not my
d-r-eam
no matter how easy i make it
seem |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 15th, 2009|01:43 am] |
the sound echoes echoes
all in slo-mo slo-mo
metal scraping
the hammer cracking back
a warm breath
a heart attack
slow release
like dissolution of belief
and i feel the cold ring
against the heat of my flesh
i close my eyes
and i think of my life
and i miss you most of all
your cackle and your warm smile
the emptiness when you've been gone for a while
and i wonder if you'll miss me too
or if you'll never forgive
that i did this to you
my departure is itself a crime
but i won't be around to do the time
i know this because
if i fail
and stick around
someone else will hear the sound
as it echoes echoes
time is all slo-mo slo-mo
metal scraping
the hammer cracking back
a last breath
a heart attack
i hold it all in my lungs
until i cannot feel my tongue
only the strength of tears
pushing back years
turning all the light into black
i close my eyes
and i think of my life
and i'm sorry that i dragged you along
your big heart and your warm smile
the silence when you've been gone for a while
and i wonder if you'll miss me too
or if you'll never forgive
that i did this to you
my departure is itself a crime
but i won't be around to do the time
i know this because
if i fail
and stick around
my scream will make an awful sound
there will be echoes echoes
the lights go slo-mo slo-mo
metal scraping
the hammer cracking back
a sudden breath
a heart attack
i tried to hold in my pain
tried for such a long while
now it has left a stain
and i can't even smile (bout that)
i close my eyes
and i think of my life
and i wonder what it was worth at all |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 26th, 2009|02:37 am] |
late night
sense of failure comes
calls to me like drums
and i answer in tears
i answer in tears
oh the late night
when the house is dark
quiet envelops me slowly
the turn-down
the rightside-up frown
making me feel so lowly
oh well
i've been here before so
you think i'd be somehow immune
oh well
you've heard this before
it's such a familiar tune
late night
sense of failure comes
i twiddles its thumbs
the passage of years
the passage of years
oh late night
when the house is dark
loneliness creeps up slowly
the bedtime
the alarm bell chime
numbs me to the feeling, if only
my friends say
you're doing fine
you follow your own time
but i feel like my time is running out
my wife says
you'll make it, don't worry
why in a hurry
my defeat is hastened by doubt
my mother says
i'm so proud of you
everything you do
but i wonder what i've done
my children say
i love you, papa
now why can't that be enough
i don't know
i don't know
empty like the drained glass
i sometimes dream is before me
something chemical to silence the voices
or somehow get them to ignore me
but nothing here
nothing real for me
just a pathetic grab at truth
but nothing here
nothing real for me
my dreams, they fade like youth
and i don't have it in me to fight
maybe my self-doubt is right
i shouldn't stay up at night
late night
sense of failure comes
calls to me like drums
and i answer in tears
i answer in tears
oh well
i've been here before so
you think i'd be somehow immune
oh well
you've heard this before
it's such a familiar tune |
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| Just a Matter of Time |
[Oct. 1st, 2009|04:55 pm] |
Be well, be safe
I just uploaded the final interior and cover for Little Fears Nightmare Edition to the printer.
I should have a proof soon. |
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| 13 DOORS - Door #10 and Door #11 |
[Sep. 30th, 2009|11:22 am] |
(Creeak. Creeeeeeeeeak.) Wait, two of them?
I've been negligent. The craziness of finalizing the book has occupied my every available second. Here's the news:
Door #10: Show Me Something went up last week. It's a text preview of the introduction chapter.
Door #11: Hiding Under the Covers went up this morning. It has a link to a 7pp PDF preview of Chapter Two: To Be Young Again.
There are less than two weeks to get your pre-orders in! Save money and get a FREE copy of the upcoming PDF supplement Campfire Tales #1.
Pre-orders end October 12th, so order today! The book (or download code) will ship October 19th.
If you're attending Madison Games Day 2: Trick or Treat, I should have copies available there and will be running demos at the event. |
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| Psst. |
[Sep. 16th, 2009|04:35 pm] |
 |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 14th, 2009|02:50 am] |
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There comes a point when you realize, "I'm not the only one growing old." And it's a terrifying thought because every day, one by one, the people and places and things you love will fall away from you. And you'll be alone, all alone. The you you were ten years ago you can hardly recall. You think you know him but you don't. Wouldn't even catch your eye passing on the street. Because he's gone, just like you are now to the you you'll be ten years from now. Strangers passing, nary a word. Nary a thought to the other's concerns. Each other's world unknown to you, forgotten or not yet lived. |
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| Very Excited |
[Sep. 8th, 2009|11:48 pm] |
Oh yeah? You ask. Why?
Because I'm revealing the cover to Little Fears Nightmare Edition tomorrow.
And it's cool.
And I love it.
And I hope you all do too. |
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